Right when I thought that I was ready for a tranquil and relaxing Christmas break, it all shattered into a million different problems for me. These shattered pieces constitute different dilemmas in my life, and right when I thought that my break has started, everything is put in reversed. School isn't as big of an issue as before when I was struck with finals and projects, and non productive partners. What keeps pushing me down and making me fall every time I try to stand back on my feet is my family. I don't know how to even describe them. They're caring and supportive in a particular way. They try to give the best to me, and make my life as easy as possible. What more can you ask from that, right??? But I always thought that trust was what constructs the foundation of the family. Yet it's the direct opposite for my family. I don't know why my sister has to lie. What good does that do???? Awhile back ago, my sister dated this guy that I really hated. He had no sparkle in his life, no real "whoa" factor for her to like him. He was older than her by 12 years, had a beer belly, and was the direct opposite of my sister. They always argue and have on and off relationships. That's stupid to me. It's either she breaks up for real, but don't linger with him on and on. Well now I know that they are still back on and dating, when she told me specifically that she has broken up with him. I don't want to see my sister jump in a pit hole and can't climb out. Personally, I find nothing attractive about that guy. I don't know what he does for a living now, but it's not something that can make her life more easier. I sensed that they will get marry, after my sister finish with her school, but trust me I WILL NOT ATTEND HER STUPID WEDDING!!!!! What sucks beside the fact that my sister is still dating that jerk is that my other sister knows about it too. What is this so called family??? Why am I backed out from this?? My other sister used to dislike her dating that guy too, but I don't know why she approves of him now. I just feel insecure when I talk with my sisters sometimes. I question myself if they're telling me the truth. I'm not paranoia, but honesty is what I value the most. Family without honesty is like a house without its frames. As hot headed and impatient as I am, I just can't control my expressed emotions sometimes. Yesterday when both of my sisters were talking, I know that they were talking about that guy in hidden words so I wouldn't understand. After hearing them talked, I was pretty upset and mad that my own sisters would lie to me. I value honesty above everything, and I can't believe that I'm living in swamps of lies. I tell myself that it's my sister's problem for dating a jerk, and she should get the consequence later on in her life. I find myself telling me that it's none of my business, but my heart and mind race to think about the relationship we shared when we were younger. Yet it all vanished once my sister dated that guy.

As if that wasn't giving me a headache enough, my dad's return to America brought more drama. My dad has been seeing this lady in Vietnam for quite some time, but this time he wants to file papers to immigrant her legally to America. Rumors have it that Vietnamese females brought to America are all materialistic and all will divorce their spouse sooner or later. Of course my sisters and I do not want that lady to come because we have never met her all these years,and we don't know her well enough. I don't want her coming over here and using up my dad's money. Yet my dad is firm about his decision. All I know is that more dramas and problems will start once she comes.

Besides my family, I have found the perfect psychology graduate school for me!!! It's located in Chicago which is a little far from where I am now, but it's extremely expensive. This school focuses only about psychology and the different fields of psychology. It is a private graduate school, which is great for me. However my family doesn't approve of this school too much. They say it's expensive because it's private and that it's too far away. But I really want to go to that school!!!! It gives me the chance to be on my own and learn the different fields of psychology that I like in a short time. It will only take me two years to get my masters and five years to get my doctorate!!! Hopefully by then I can be able to go to this graduate school.